Julian Pohl
Yesturday, Today and Tomorrow
My future watches me.
It is always present like Desteny.
Decicions will decide on my job.
A house and a wife
Is the aspiration.
Though my mind
Is deadpan and stolid,
Waiting to be filled
Present is alive.
I have the command.
I can change to
The path I search
So dilligently.
The past ditches me,
Out of his game every second.
I like that you ordered your poem from the future to the past most people ordered t the other way. I feel this structure really works well though too. I like the first three lines because the first and second rhyme and then the D is repeated in the second and third. Also you used good language in a lot of the poem. And the second stanza about the present is good I just like what you wrote.
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